So Randy took the day off today. I think after Thursday’s events and then our big weekend, he just needed a day to decompress a bit, plus he really wanted to get some quality time in with W.
We got up and went to Dr. Heather’s, ate breakfast, headed to library story time. Came home to a voicemail from Cosette. It was 11. I called her back. She had scheduled my ultrasound, but instead of a quick peek at Mintzer’s, she ended up deciding we really needed a biophysical at Mahone’s. She was really, really worried about the lack of fundal height growth combined with the fact that MTHFR can make women more prone to having placentas that crap out early. And I could totally hear her worry in her voice, too.
And I think she genuinely thought they would not let us go home. She wanted to be sure to prepare me for that possibility before we went over. If it was a good result, they would let us go home. If it was a bad result, they’d keep us there until we had a plan. “Plan” meaning – they would want to send me up to L&D for induction, and Cosette would tell them we preferred to go to Broadlawns and off we’d go.
And the appt was at 11:30. So I had totally been at a place where I was at peace with the potential for an induction. It would allow me to set up a day that would work well with my sister’s schedule, we could spend a few days prepping Wally for the change in plans, whatever. I would have had at least a day or so to prepare myself mentally and do enough affirmations that I would actually believe that it would turn out great, etc. So then learning at 11 that maybe after my 11:30 appt, I’d go have a baby… that was a mental adjustment.
One I’m proud to say I kind of made, kicking and screaming (in my head) the whole time. But I was able to say to myself “my goal all along has been an ALIVE baby. If this is what we need to achieve that, then I’m all for it. In a sense.”
I also gained a bit of new perspective on my emotional distress at recent events. In addition to the aforementioned “birth as a medical event” thing that disgusts me, I had pointed out to me today that, while I’m usually really good at going with the flow and adapting to the situation, I do not do well with major changes to major plans. I need some time. A day or so. Not 30 minutes.
At any rate, I’m still here and still pregnant. They let me go home. We did not have a consult with either of the doctors, but the nurse who did the exam said that she had no concerns, everything looked GREAT. Fluid levels were good, blood flow to the baby looked good, baby looked good, baby was still alive which is always a bonus. She did circle “small for dates” on my chart, and noted that we were in the 36th percentile for growth. BUT she said that her guess on weight was 7 lbs. I’m 39 weeks. Even if considering that the u/s can be off by a pound either way… that seems REALLY average to me. I asked Cosette about that and she wasn’t sure, either.
But she did say she was greatly relieved, and felt that she could finally take a deep breath and relax about it. Which is good.
The good thing about this is that I trust Cosette explicitly. That doesn’t mean I don’t ask questions, etc., but it does mean that if she recommends something, I don’t feel suspicious, wondering what the motive is.
PS, now you know this just puts additional ammo in my Dr Mintzer’s Office Is Bad JuJu thing. Mahone’s office seems to be where we learn good things.