OK, Idiot People might be a bit too harsh. Let’s stick just with idiot questions.
I kind of expected it with the homebirth. Apparently, by the way, we never did get around to telling Randy’s family. I told my whole family, though if my mom had still been alive, it would be a different story. Anyway, on trick or treat night, when Genevieve was a day old, I spent the evening at my SIL’s house while W and Randy went trick or treating with W’s cousins. My SIL spent the evening telling me how nice it was to have those days in the hospital to rest and get away from her other children. (I didn’t tell her that one of the reasons we wanted to be at home was we wanted W to be able to stay with us – call me crazy, but I LIKE the kid.)
Several of SIL’s friends dropped by with their kids (and we kept a safe distance!), and each and every one of them asked how we got out so early. It was interesting watching their faces as I said, “oh, we had her at home.” But everyone largely kept their opinions about this to themselves.
I’ll note, my aunt had all of her kids at home with lay midwives. A decision she has taken a LOT of heat for over the years. They were, during the time she was having children, members of one of those southern churches that believes that women should not see male doctors, but should only see other female members of the church for health problems. Or at least that’s how my mom explained it to me. I’ve honestly never asked her. But I do recall lots of unflattering opinions expressed around the dinner table about her and her crazy notions. ha. Well, my aunt called as soon as she heard the news and was THRILLED we had her at home. Her own daughter has taken a more conventional approach, and I think she’s been somewhat disappointed. Her reasons for choosing homebirth were vastly different from mine, but she does share the foundational idea that childbirth is not a health emergency. It’s nice.
But on to the idiot questions. Today, I got my first “is she a good baby” from a poll worker. I hesitated a minute, stuck between my natural desire to be polite and my strong desire to hit people who ask that question. Then popped out with “well, she’s not quite a week old, she hasn’t been around long enough to cause much trouble.” Not quite the “well, she’s already a week old and hasn’t committed any major crimes yet” I wanted to say, but also not the polished “is there such a thing as a bad baby” that used to be my standby with Wally. I’m about four years rusty on my smartass baby comments. I shall have to work on that.