Alright, so I’ve been wondering if I have a mild form of Asperger’s.
A while back, someone posted a quiz on Facebook, and while I don’t think that Facebook quizzes are the utmost in diagnostic tools, it turns out that the quiz is actually, you know, more based in science than “how bootylicious is your cat?” You can see it here. Every time I take it, I score in the range of 19-43. That’s really high.
“Based upon your responses to this autism screening measure, it appears that you are likely suffering from an autism spectrum disorder, or Asperger’s disorder. People who score similarly often qualify for a diagnosis of autism or Asperger’s. People with an autism spectrum disorder often suffer from severe and sustained impairment in social interaction and the development of restricted, repetitive patterns of behavior, interests, and activities. The disturbance must cause clinically significant impairment in social, occupational, or other important areas of functioning. You should not take this as a diagnosis of any sort, or a recommendation for treatment. However, it would be advisable and likely beneficial for you to seek further diagnosis from a trained mental health professional soon to rule out a possible anxiety disorder.”
This morning, I found this page at Psychology Today. I answered no to both questions. Apparently, that’s something that someone with Asperger’s would say.
But, beyond quizzes, what really got me thinking about this is watching Parenthood. A few episodes ago, the family with the Asperger’s boy hired a man with Asperger’s to do a bug presentation for their son’s birthday. The man was definitely extremely quirky, but he reminded me of an overblown version of myself. He had everything set up to help him feel better, to help him deal with the situation. He was fine inconveniencing his customers so that he could set up the situation how he wanted it.
And I am SO the same way. I hate interruptions, and so I have a limited number of available “spots” for people to make appointments. I get extremely upset if people are early or late. My first inclination to any special request is to say no because it’s not how I like to do things. For the most part, I keep these impulses under control, but wow.
After this observation, I started realizing how much of my life is set up so that things are the way I want them. How much I avoid looking in people’s eyes. How extremely uncomfortable I am with social situations – even with my own friends. And I know some of that’s normal, but I think my stuff might border on the abnormal.
But I’m also well – WELL – aware of the fact that highly intelligent people (and, sorry to be blunt, but that does include me) exhibit a large number of characteristics similar to Autism – serious social awkwardness, for example, and quirky behavior, and inappropriate comments.
I don’t know that it matters, and I’m not trying to be all dramatic. It’s interesting, if nothing else. Considering that Autism spectrum disorders might be hereditary, I wonder if it’s worth seeing someone about, just to find out for sure.
Makes me super happy that I don’t vaccinate. (and, no, I do not believe that vaccines CAUSE autism. I do believe, and continue to believe, that vaccines can be the straw that breaks the camel’s back, so to speak, in individuals who might be prone, and that we don’t know how to tell if someone is prone to autism until it’s too late.)